Feelings of outrage, ambivalence: 2002 terror victim faces release of the family's killer in Gaza hostage deal

Tzofia Felsen Dikshtein’s world collapsed in 2002 when terrorists ambushed and murdered her parents and brother in a calculated attack. Now their murderer will walk free as part of the current ceasefire hostage-release deal between Israel and the Hamas terror group.

Today, Dikshtein deals in the serious business of life, in defiance of the death that defined her journey when she was just 19 years old. 

Her family was the first to be shot near Hebron by a group of terrorists who were deliberately firing at Israeli cars at the Zif Junction. Both her parents and six of the 10 children were inside. Her brother was instantly killed, and her mother died of the head injury she sustained in the attack. When her father Yossi leapt from the car for help, he was executed with 14 bullets fired into his chest. 

“The sky fell down,” said Dikshtein. “I knew my life would never be the same again.” She and her brother were left raising the family – and carrying a deep wound of trauma.

The terrorist responsible for their deaths, 25-year-old Bakr Khalil Shahadah Al-Najjar from Yata, received six life sentences for the attacks. “I knew I could sleep soundly, knowing that the terrorist who murdered my parents was behind bars for the rest of his life,” said Dikshtein.

Now the wound was ripped open again when the news came that Al-Najjar will be among the Palestinian prisoners released this weekend.

“Your stomach turns over, and I say, 'Why him, of all people?' A person who killed, who murdered, blood in his eyes, blood on his hands,” said Dikshtein in dismay. “It's incomprehensible.”

Together with all of Israel, Dikstein is torn. While Israelis want to see the hostages returned to their families, some of these Palestinian prisoners have committed the most heinous crimes.

Speaking of the ambivalence she feels, Dikshtein told Israel's Kan News, “It takes me back 22 years, to an open wound, to my parents who were… to the family that was orphaned that entire difficult period. But on the other hand, I’m not there, I’m not 19. I’m already 41, I have kids, I have a life, I have a job, and I have a baby inside me reminding me – life is stronger than everything.”

Dikshtein, who is now a midwife with four children of her own and another on the way, has made it her mission to engage in the “business of life” and to spread as much happiness as she can as a means of countering death and destruction. She explained her philosophy.

“Mom and Dad, I'm sorry, but we continue with life. Because my whole life is about life, this is midwifery. I chose to be a midwife because I chose to engage in life. I chose to witness renewal in the delivery room every time I go to work.”

Resolute in her determination to enjoy life to the full, her children’s names reflect both a memorial of her parents and Hebrew expressions of joy.

“Bringing the soul to joy – listen, that’s the hardest thing. But it’s really important to me that the kids experience happiness, not only because I grew up in a very, very happy home, where there was so much joy, but also because it’s important to me for the feeling of victory,” Dikshtein said.

“What helped me was just taking a screenshot of the hostages, their pictures – just looking into their eyes. Those eyes say everything. So I drew strength from those pictures and told myself, They deserve to hug their parents. And what I couldn’t do, at least they should be able to.”